Tears of the Politician

When Putin won his presidency, this photo can be seen in almost everywhere, you see tear(s) coming out from his eye. On the other hand, the Russian opposition cry foul that Putin is buying votes. Hmmm... that reminds me of what's happening in other places of the world. Anyhow, if you ask me, I think the tears is a bit fake, I don't buy it even though if I am a Russian.

Me and my colleagues were having a chat on how politician skillfully make use of their tears. We came out with some conclusions -

1. Try to squeeze out only ONE single drop, NOT too much and NOT too less.

2. Make sure the tear drop is big enough for the media to capture it, if media can't capture your tears, sorry, your tear is wasted.

3. DON'T CRY, shed tear(s) ONLY!

Let's check out a few samples of "Tear Tactic" usage:


Sample 1: "FLOM" (self declared First Lady of Malaysia), when being 'accused' for buying a damn expensive ring, going for shopping spree with tax payer's money... Just show your faces that you are being 'framed' and twisted by political opponents. Before you do that, make sure you put away your Patek Phillipe wrist watch and your Birkin handbag, anyway, normal people probably have no idea what the hell is that.


Sample 2: Well, this is a bit too much, you break rule #3... (playing don't cry for me Argentina...) I still remember such photos are everywhere on newspaper many years ago. You see, people get very emotional in politics when you know you are not elected; or you are being elected; or you get or don't get any projects; or you get awarded with a interest free loan of 5 billion, whether you like it or not, etc..Sample 3: Wipe tears for someone, do it slowly so the press can snap your photo from multiple angles. This is a good one, it shows that you are strong, while holding your tears, you wipe off others' tear to show you have a compassion heart. Make sure you do it slowly and gently. Another reminder for you, don't talk when you are wiping off the tears, so your saliva won't fell onto other people's forehead.

This will be the true winner in "tear tactics!"